Dicas de Tradução / Translation Tips: Top 10 most annoying Americanisms

3.29.2011

Top 10 most annoying Americanisms

By Toby Harnden
            Michelle Obama just sent me an email wishing me “Happy Holidays” and asking me to give money “to causes that are especially meaningful to me and my family” (food banks and deployed troops – not the Obama campaign this time).
            She doesn’t mention Christmas at all, instead talking vaguely of “a time to celebrate our blessings, the new year, and a new era for our country”.
            The term “Happy Holidays” is certainly one that grates on this British ear and I confess it’s not the only one. Every day, I have to navigate the common language which, as George Bernard Shaw put it, divides our two nations.
            But I don’t mean simple Americanisms like stroller (pushchair), diaper (nappy), ladybug (ladybird), Mom (Mum), entrée (main course), Santa (Father Christmas), takeout (takeaway), pre-owned (secondhand), mad (angry), chill (calm down), Santa (Father Christmas) etc etc but the phrases that really make you want to go postal.
            Here are the top 10 that, after nearly seven years here, infuriate me most:
1.         “Happy Holidays.”Translation: “Merry Christmas but I realise you might be Jewish, Buddhist, Hindu, Muslim, Bahai, something even more exotic, agnostic or Godless and I don’t want to offend you.”
2.          “Have a Nice Day.” Translation: “I would like you to have a pleasant time today” or “I hate you” – or anything in between.
3.          “You’re welcome.” Translation: Meaningless Pavlovian response to thank you.
4.          “Do the math.” Translation: “Work it out yourself, stupid.”
5.          “Let’s visit with each other.” Translation: “We should spend time together.”
6.          “How are you today?” Translation: “We mean nothing to each other, but let’s pretend.”
7.          “Good luck with that.” Translation: “You have no chance at all.”
8.          “Oh my gosh!“ Translation: “I fear you may feel that taking the Lord’s name in vain is blasphemous.”
9.          “Can I use your bathroom?“ Translation: “I would like to use your lavatory.”
10.          “Not so much.” Translation: “That’s completely wrong.” Used on me in classic fashion by a Clinton aide back in February.
              Maybe there are others that make your blood boil – or some Britishisms that really get under your skin.
http://blogs.telegraph.co.uk/news/tobyharnden/6043777/Top_10_most_annoying_Americanisms/

Rose Polato

Experiência de mais de 30 anos: 10 anos na Divisão de Engenharia de empresa norte-americana; 5 anos no Iraque, como tradutora da Mendes Júnior (construção pesada); 3 anos em empresa de auditoria (uma das Big Six) (auditoria, contratos); 20 anos em diversas áreas (+-8.000 currículos para Catho e Manager; +-40.000 laudas de tradução). Tradutora Pública e Intérprete Comercial (Juramentada) aprovada em Concurso da JUCESP(Ano 2000), Certificate of Proficiency in English /University of Michigan [EUA-1973]; International Legal English Certificate-ILEC/University of Cambridge (Inglaterra-2007].

Atualizado sempre que possível.

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...se identifica totalmente com a música abaixo!

FIVE THOUSAND WORDS
(Lyrics and music © by Sharon Neeman)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O9KbQyrxSIo

The clock showed close to quitting time;
my desk was almost clear;
I thought perhaps I'd slip

around the corner for a beer -
But the phone rang - and I answered -
and a friendly voice said "Hi!"
It was the secretary of a legal firm nearby.
She said "Oh, please excuse me

for calling this late in the day,
But we have a new petition

in a case that's under way;
Can you translate it by tomorrow?
Any time by five will do -
'Cause we wouldn't want to give the work

to anyone but you:

It's: only: Five thousand words

for tomorrow at five;
I thought "I'll do that easily;
I'll scarcely have to strive,
" So I smiled and said

"No problem;

I'll just add it to my bill,
And you'll send a check on Friday?"
And she said "You know we will."

I set to work at eight AM;

I cut my lunch date short;
By five the stuff was ready

to be filed before the Court;
I sent it off by email and

I poured a cup of tea -
And the phone rang -

and I answered -
and a lawyer asked from me:

"I've just leafed through your translation,

and I think it's very good,
And I'd like you to translate an affidavit,

if you could;
It's the size of that petition -

well, perhaps a little more -
And you know that I'd be grateful if

you'd have it in by four;

It's: only: Six thousand words

for tomorrow at four;"
I thought "I'll get up early;

I've a longish day in store,"
And I shrugged and said

"No problem;
I'll just add it to my bill
And you'll send a check on Friday?"
And he said "You know we will."

I hit the desk at seven and

I ate my lunch alone;
I never touched the Solitaire or

gossiped on the phone;
At four o'clock I sent it off and

shook my weary head -

And the phone rang -

and I answered -
and the junior partner said:
"I really have to thank you

for a job superbly done,
And I'm sure you'll be delighted,

'cause we've got another one:
I've just finished my summation,

and you know how glad I'd be

If your excellent translation

could be on my desk by three:
It's: only: Eight thousand words

for tomorrow at three;"

I thought, "It won't be easy:

but I'll have the evening free,"
So I sighed and said

"No problem; I'll just add it to my bill,

And you'll send a check on Friday?"
And she said "You know we will."

I started at five-thirty,

and my lunch was just a snack;
At three I typed the last few words

and sent the email back;
I flexed my aching fingers

and I silently rejoiced -
And the phone rang - and I answered -
and the senior partner's voice said:

"You really are a wonder,

and your talents are unique -
In fact, that's why

we've kept you very busy all this week;
Now, I know that it's short notice,

but I have to count on you -

For the Judge needs my rebuttal

to be on her desk at two:
It's: only: Ten thousand words

for tomorrow at two;"

I thought, "How can I tell him that

it's just too much to do?"

But I groaned and said

"No problem; I'll just add it to my bill,

And you'll send a check on Friday?"
And he said "You know we will."

I staggered in at four AM;

I never ate a bite;
But I got it done by two,

although it was a trifle tight;
I was dizzy, I was queasy,

and I thought I'd never budge -
But the phone rang - and I answered -
and by God, it was the Judge!

She said, "I know you're tired,

and I really hate to ask,
But there's no one in the city

that can do this one last task:
For I've handed down my ruling,"

and she gave a modest cough, "

And at one PM tomorrow,

the courier takes off:
It's: only: Twelve thousand words

for tomorrow at one;
" My mind screamed "No, Your Honor!
There are things that can't be done!"

But the words came out "No problem;
I'll just add it to my bill"
And it's been four months since Friday,
and the bastards owe me still!

3.29.2011

Top 10 most annoying Americanisms

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Rose Polato

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